How should I say this...

"How should I say this. I think there is a part of me that wants to want you but something in me is telling me no."

There was a point when the simple of thought of you makes me going. 

I know it's wrong because I must do this for myself.

But knowing you'll be there pushes me to the extremes. 

To begin with, I am a very complicated person.

Weird in my own ways